Jason just left for CA this morning--we always miss him, but the girls are looking forward to having a night each in my bed (and I'll have one night alone in my king size bed....or maybe Ben will end up in there!) Went swimming yesterday at the clubhouse w/ the Hamns....but the gate was locked...so we let the kids scale the fence to swim....I felt like a criminal!! I'm supposed to have a key to the gate; will have to figure out why I don't.
I start to get "anxious" this time every year (our 4th year homeschooling!).....I think I just want so badly to have a successful year, to be productive, to be a good steward of our time, to make a difference in their lives, and to somehow ensure a great year by starting off on the right foot. And, in my mind, this will all be precipitated by choosing the right curriculum. So, I've been on my annual search for the PERFECT curriculum.....argh! I do this every year! There really is just so much great stuff to choose from out there that I don't want to miss or overlook anything. I truly am a lifelong learner and therefore, can be somewhat of a schizophrenic learner b/c I have this desire to want to learn everything....cover all the bases. The truth is that God can accomplish his purposes through ANY curriculum if I give myself, my home, my day, and my children to Him!! I'm putting my faith in the WRONG THINGS! My logical brain knows that this is impossible, but my (illogical?) brain refuses to concede! I've talked w/ God about this often and His answer is always the same...."give it to me--for my yoke is easy and my burden is light".....so, I'll let Him carry it for a while...and then I take it back! Sounds ridiculous, I know--maybe I miss the weight of the burden?! Maybe I'm so bold as to think that I'm the only one who can properly worry about it all?! Either way, it's ridiculous....and yet, I keep doing it! Sounds a little like the Israelites in the Old Testament; God proved over and over that he could be trusted....and yet they turned away from Him (and to theirselves or other gods) over and over and over!! "Why are ye fearful, O ye of little faith?" Matthew 8:26 So maybe it's fear that he'll let me down...or pride that I can do it better...or both? Lord, let my heart be humbled today (always a little scary to pray for humility) and let me remember, in ALL I do, that you are Lord, King, Giver of everything, Alpha and Omega!! Let me rest in you today.
Ella sent Jason a sweet and encouraging email this morning. She offered several bits of advice ending with a reminder about the importance of making time daily for two things: "Just wanted to remind you to do your best and to always make time for two things, God and stretching, no mater how busy you are!" :) Love it!!
beautiful: God's continued love and forgiveness in the midst of my sin!
good: the quietness of EARLY morning
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